I’m just not very good with Resolutions. I think, for me, the problem is that If there is something in my life that isn’t working, I am not going to wait until January 1 to fix it.
No way, Jose.
Mama ain’t got time for that.
If it ain’t working, I’m gonna fix it.
And so that’s why last year I chose ONE WORD to focus on instead and make that my “goal” for the year. Last year, my word changed throughout the year from FOCUS to PATIENCE…the FOCUS aspect came into play as my goal of successfully having a VBAC with Lowe was really all I could focus on.
Looking back, it was so much easier that I probably could’ve spent less energy on it. Or, maybe it was b/c I did spend all of that energy on it that it was so easy.
PATIENCE…well, obviously. Two Boys…
This year, I was torn between two words with the one I DID NOT choose being FAITH.
But I couldn’t settle on that word b/c it really felt like just that, SETTLING. I wanted to have FAITH in our decision to move and FAITH in Kirk’s dream to do so.
The word wasn’t working for me b/c, in my heart, that FAITH was already there. I trust Kirk with every fiber of my being and asking for FAITH in him was like asking for a left hand. I already have a left hand, I just don’t need to use it a whole lot!
Instead, the word I’ve chosen a word that will be very difficult for me. It’s a word that is complete opposite of my personality, my brain and my very being.
I’m not so good at STILL in any sense of the word. Not when it comes to no disturbances (2 boys, remember?). Not in calmness (2 boys). Peace and quiet are Christmas Wishes. I am quite restless, so hoping to STILL that and Serenity is only uttered nightly in my prayers.
I’m hoping this new house, new views and new adventure can help me to be STILL.
The current owner keeps telling me “there is much to learn in this land, this nature” and I quite look forward to learning whatever it is she’s talking about. To go from a cul de sac with 22 kids to 13 acres with 2 horses and NO neighbors will surely teach me something.
I think this is the perfect word at the perfect time in my life for me to focus on. I woke up at 7 a.m. this morning and the first thing I said to Kirk when I rolled over was, “What’s the plan for today?”
He sighed and gave me that why do we always need a plan? look. I just DO…I’m not very good at just sitting around. I like to be on the move, getting things done, cleaning, putting something away, organizing….my hands don’t like to be still any more than my legs do.
I’m going to try really hard to be STILL. I really am.
Here’s to 2016 and hoping for STILL.
What’s your One Word?